Things that become clear to you as you’ve gotten older

Another collection of the best insights found on an AskReddit thread:

posted by u/SarcastasticJenn – 1 year ago
Reddit, what’s become clear to you as you’ve gotten older?

Original reddit thread: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/6q2b8x/reddit_whats_become_clear_to_you_as_youve_gotten/


1. Nobody cares

by [deleted user] – 9.5k points – 1 year ago

 

No one cares about you. Not like family and very close friends, but for the other 99.99% of the world, you are a statistic. Kinda hard to come to grips with, but it feels a lot better once you stop being the main character of your world and realize we’re all in this shit together.

 

by rabidassbaboon – 619 points – 1 year ago

 

I actually find this fact kind of freeing. It’s a lot easier to not get hung up on your mistakes and shortcomings when you realize the vast majority of the rest of the human beings on this planet don’t give a shit.

by ThatLexxyFellow – 368 points – 1 year ago

 

‘You’d worry less what other people thought of you if you realised how little they did’

Another user links to another blog post that helped him to better understand the meaning conveyed above:

 by SANguy – 2.3k points – 1 year ago – 2 gold
This really helps explain it for me.

As with all other article that is worth to be read, it is a lenghty one for sure. The article is about “The Monkeysphere”. To read it, you can click on the comment above, or click the link below:
http://www.cracked.com/article_14990_what-monkeysphere.html

In short, the Monkeysphere is about the inability of a single human to keep track or care enough about so many people outside their “sphere” of friends. A research found out that a human could keep track about 150 other people. A good example is summed up on this question:
“which would upset you more, your best friend dying, or a dozen kids across town getting killed because their bus collided with a truck?”
There’s nothing wrong with not caring some strangers across the world, that’s the point we’re trying to make here. It just isn’t possible to care for a billion strangers.

The article opens with a good and relevant qoute:

“One death is a tragedy. One million deaths is a statistic.”
Kevin Federline

I personally see that this “no one cares” mentality to be liberating. I can do whatever I want. No obligation to please anybody, because no one cares deeply enough.


2. Time is fleeting

by will1816 – 24.0k points – 1 year ago

Time really passes quickly. Hours are long, but days are short.

This is an old saying that everybody would have heard at least once, but still, don’t underestimate how quick time passes. Below is a rather depressing insight about how some people let time passes just that, and not living up to their “potential”.

by Portarossa – 7.2k points – 1 year ago – 1 Gold

 

An astonishing amount of people will try to spend their lives coasting on the potential they had as kids/teenagers/young adults.

‘Potential’ is toxic, once you get past a certain point. It lets you forgive yourself for not actually turning up and putting the hard yards in, because you know you could, so why actually bother? That’s why novels go unwritten and canvases remain blank.

 

by Warhawk69 – 3.0k points – 1 year ago – 1 Gold

 

Had an old football coach that always told me:

“You know what potential means? It means you ain’t done shit yet”

That always stuck with me.

by rootdootmcscoot – 2.2k points – 1 year ago – 1 Gold

 

Of course, it’s also toxic because a lot of ‘potential’ was shown to children when they were very little. Once everyone else caught up, these people who were called the smart kids are just about on par with everyone else, and they’re left there wondering if they lost something or they’re not smart anymore, because all the attention and extra love they got is suddenly gone and nobody told them why. And for the rest of their life, they’re going to think something’s wrong with them or they did something wrong


3. There are shortcuts, and life isn’t as fair as it seems to be

Below are another reminder that attitude and work ethic can and will go for a long way.

by Carl_Clegg – 8.0k points – 1 year ago

 

People who talk more and have more confidence (regardless of ability) will always do better in their careers than people who are actually really good at their job.

 

by rostinze – 2.3k points – 1 year ago

 

In my industry, being likable is at least as important, if not more important, than actually being good. Yep. Been saying that for years.

 

by DownWithDiodes – 1.0k points – 1 year ago

 

It’s crazy just how far a good reputation can get you. Your likeability can make your career go smoothly and in the direction you would like it to go, or it could make your career an absolute drag. If you perform well, the next step to success is having people like you. You want people who can vouch for you, who will support you. I’m at the beginning of my career, and I actively work on maintaining a good reputation in my organization. ‘Fake it ’til you make it’! Be a good worker, a team player, have a positive attitude, and work hard.

And also a reminder that life isn’t fair

by DerThan – 4.2k points – 1 year ago
Some people are just ridiculously lucky

 

by amberheartss – 1.8k points – 1 year ago
Yes, and the opposite is also true.


4. You don’t need anybody else to be happy

by Pm_me_coffee_ – 4.0k points – 1 year ago

 

If you can learn to come to terms with who you are and be happy with that then everything becomes easier. Basically, stop beating yourself up.

 

In the (probably misquoted) words of Homer Simpson “don’t keep blaming yourself, blame yourself once and move on”

That’s a way to put it, “come to terms” with life in general. Learn the Stoicism philosophy. Just be aware that whatever life throws at us, we still got to choose how we respond to it.

by Murfdigidy – 494 points – 1 year ago

 

Acceptance, life is all about acceptance

 

Girl doesn’t like you, accept it. Guy is no longer a true friend, accept it. People can be aholes, accept it. You’re sick, accept it. You lost a promotion or job, accept it.

 

It’s all about accepting reality as how it plays out. Do the best you can in life, love those luckily enough to be in your life and accept the ones that no longer are. At the end of the day you’re wasting energy on negative things you have no control over in most instances, so stop fighting them, as it’s wasted energy. accept it, move on, and then go in a direction of creating positive steps and thoughts that you can actually control

by HowItEnds – 4.7k points – 1 year ago

 

You really need to be doing the things that make you happy.

I’ve been seeking jobs my whole life for the sole purpose of surviving. The older I get, the more I realize I need to be chasing and honoring the things that make me happy. I always thought there would be other time for me to do the things that make me happy but, that time is now. I’ve been waiting for a time that, it turns out, has always been now.